Hypnotherapy Testimonials

Here are some more recent hypnotherapy comments from satisfied clients.  You can find even more on our customer feedback page.

I made it to Italy in a calm & relaxed way and quite enjoyed the flight. I'm hoping the positive feelings about flying stay with me. We're planning next year's holiday! Thanks for your help

(Phobia of flying - Chiswick practice)

 

I've lost 6kg since our last appointment in June and have been going to the gym regularly.  The sessions have helped me considerably and I can't thank you enough

(Weight Loss Hypnotherapy Kew)

 

Why diets don't work!

A vast majority of the population has probably tried some form of diet at some point in their lives, but the fact is, for most people, diets don’t work.  Now there are probably many people reading this now who will disagree, focussing on the likes of Weight Watchers, Slimming World and all those other diet based weight loss institutions out there.  And while these organisations may have short term success with their members, when you look a year, two years, five years or ten years into the future of those members, you often find that the weight loss they experienced through dieting is unsustainable, especially after the member stops going to the weekly meetings. 

Many of you reading this will have surely experienced for yourself, trying countless diets, your weight going up and down like a yo-yo, feelings of exhilaration one week only to be followed by despair the next, getting to a point where inevitably you stop your diet and then the weight piling back on, in some cases worse than before. 

So what’s really going on here?  Why do diets not work and is it possible for sustained weight loss over the long term?  Allow yourself to imagine for a moment, your life as it would be if you lived 10,000 years ago.  Your life would have been nomadic, constantly on the move, hunting and gathering.  Supermarkets and shops didn’t exist and there were no ways of storing food for any length of time.  Your trigger to eat was simply driven by hunger.  When your body needed food, it released the hormone to make you feel hungry, encouraging you to hunt and gather.  When your body didn’t need food,that hunger wasn’t present and so you had no need to hunt and gather.  Simply put, you ate when you felt genuinely hungry and stopped eating when you stopped feeling hungry. 

From an evolutionary and biological point of view, the human body has changed little in the last 10,000 years and we are still primarily driven by this hunger / full signal.  However, modern society has effectively disrupted this driver.  Just think of the concept of meal times.  Meal times are convenient in modern, structured society, but forcing the body to eat when it is not hungry is not healthy.  And forcing the body to wait for a set meal time when it is genuinely in need of food is again, detrimental. 

Now think for a moment about all those verbal messages around food given to children as they grow “think of all the starving children in Africa”, “You will be sent to your room if you don’t eat all that”, “Do you know how hard we work to put food on the table”, etc.  I’m sure you can name many more sayings around food from your own childhood.

And then there are the non-verbal messages.  Observing parents and peers eating a biscuit with a coffee or a bag of crisps with a sandwich.  Being given a lollipop when they go to the doctors, sweets or chocolate when they need comforting, ice cream as a reward for good behaviour, pizza or takeaways as a treat for working hard.  The truth is, by the time a child becomes a teenager, they have been exposed to countless verbal and non-verbal messages around food and eating.  What they should eat, when they should eat, what foods connect with what emotional state, what circumstances certain foods are allowed in, etc. 

So what does all this have to do with unsuccessful diets?  Firstly, diets teach you that you are only allowed certain foods in certain quantities and certain times.  This is not how the human body operates.  Factors such as activity, the weather, illnesses, emotional states, fatigue and even brain usage mean that we need different amounts of food each day.  Your body tells you what it needs and when it needs it.  It is important to listen to your body and respond appropriately, not to try and force a particular eating regime onto yourself which may not be in your body’s best interest. 

Secondly, forcing yourself to eat certain foods in certain quantities at certain times does not begin to uncover or reverse those negative messages you have been exposed to all of your life.  The truth is, your subconscious mind will always win out over your conscious mind.  So if your subconscious is convinced that chocolate is the best solution when you are feeling sad, you may be able to fight that impulse for a while, but ultimately, that conflict between your conscious and subconscious will wear you down and your subconscious will eventually win out.  It is here that hypnotherapy has the greatest impact, changing these negative messages at a subconscious level. 

So, are you genuinely still interested in losing weight and keeping that weight off for the long term?  If so, stop listening to these fad diets and dieting organisations and start listening to yourself.  Allow yourself to become more aware of those negative and harmful messages you learnt around food as you grew.  And most importantly, teach yourself to tune into that genuine hunger and full signal from your body.  If you are genuinely hungry, eat slowly until you feel satisfied.  And once you feel satisfied, stop eating until the next time you feel genuinely hungry.

And if you are still struggling, why not look into how hypnotherapy can help you to break those negative messages and become more in tune with yourself once again.  You may just find that you’ve held the key to sustainable weight loss within you the whole time!

 

Sitting with your feelings (no matter how uncomfortable!)

There are many in society who believe that experiencing negative emotions such as fear, anger, sadness, jealousy, etc. is wrong.  They believe that those feelings are unhelpful and should be conquered through the use of positive thoughts, cognitive thinking and behavioural changes.  In fact, a lot of the concepts around Cognitive Behavioural Therapy are just that - using behavioural techniques to change how we think and therefor how we feel.   

However I've always been a great believer in sitting with your feelings and allowing yourself time to understand them and acknowledge them, rather than trying to chase them away and bury them.  Now I'm not saying to dwell on feelings or become immersed in them, but at the same time, not to block them out either.  I like to think of it as watching a lightening storm out of your bedroom window.  You are safe enough inside your house that you are not going to get hurt by the lightening, but at the same time, you are allowing yourself to see it and experience it (rather than shutting the curtains and hiding under your bed covers!)

The benefits of sitting with your feelings really hit home during a recent client session.  The client began by talking about their work, how they had lost their motivation and had become disillusioned with it.  They explained how they dreaded going to work and were desperately looking for some alternative.  A few days before the session, the client had spoken to their mother about their feelings.  The mother was very solution focussed, coming up with idea after idea after idea about the possible solutions, e.g. more training courses, ideas for new jobs, careers advisors, etc.  As my client sat and listened to her mother, she became more and more upset and more and more despondent.  She didn't want solutions, she just wanted to be heard and acknowledged.  She wanted her mother to be empathic and understand her feelings.  My client wanted to know that she was still acceptable and still lovable even if she was feeling this way, however her mothers problem solving response made her feel that she was unacceptable and wrong in some way, as if she was failing.  This made her feel much worse. 

Later in the same session with my client, I began to question whether she was using psychotherapy theories and cognitive reasoning as a way of avoiding or burying certain internal feelings.  She admitted that there were times when she was doing that, however believed that it was the right thing to do.  She believed that she could control her unwanted feelings through CBT techniques and other practical methods then it would make her feel better in herself.  I referred her back to earlier in the session when she had spoken about the discussion between herself and her mother and explained how I was hearing that exact same conversation going on within her.

One part of her, which we may call the Parent (in reference to Transactional Analyses terminology), was wanting to problem solve, using practical techniques to overcome her feelings.  However another part, which we may call the Child (also TA terminology), was yearning to be heard for what it was feeling, wanting those unpleasant feelings to be acknowledged, recognised and accepted. 

My client was quite taken aback by this realisation.  She had understood what it felt like to have her need to be heard and acknowledged ignored by the practical approach of her mother and here she was, doing exactly the same thing to herself. 

This understanding has since helped my client to sit with her unpleasant feelings for longer.  Most of the time, she finds they now disappear much sooner and stay away much longer.  I like to think of it as a small child trying to get it's mother's attention.  The more the child is ignored, the more it will interrupt and the louder and more demanding it will get.  However once that child has been heard and acknowledged, it is more likely to feel satisfied and not pester it's mother for attention for a while.

I am a firm believer in feeling your feelings, sitting with them and then choosing a course of action rather than just reacting which often reinforces negative beliefs and emotions.  I have found on countless occasions how accepting all feelings as being fundamentally "okay" and listening to them has provided great therapeutic insights and relief for clients.  So next time you experience fear, anger, sadness, despair, loneliness or any other negative feeling, why not give it a go yourself?  Rather than covering up and burying these emotions, try sitting with them for a while, tolerating the discomfort, learning from those feelings and really understanding that part of yourself. 

Emstart Personal Training

Here at West London Counselling, Hypnotherapy and Psychotherapy services, we recognise that a healthy life is a direction rather than a destination.  For those interested in Weight Loss hypnotherapy or counselling, your weight loss journey may begin with us, but it's also a journey which continues long after our sessions finish.  We are proud to associate ourselves with Emstar Personal Training who can take your new found sense of health to the next level.  Please contact Aaron for details of a free consultation.

 

Emstar Personal Training

If you want to have more energy in your day, or dream of having a six-pack, a customised fitness program designed by me is tailored to your specific needs and your individual fitness level. You will receive full support every step of the way through your training. The combination of motivational support and exercise is a vital component to success with weight loss or increasing muscle tone.

I hold advanced qualifications in sport science, personal training, together with top industry accreditations. I am highly certified with 10 year’s of experience in the fitness field. I am a friendly, personable and well-educated professional who knows exactly how to get the best for you. Sessions are fun, varied and highly motivational - I guarantee that you'll certainly not get fed up of your workouts easily!

I can offer potential clients a free consultation so that we can discuss your goals and find out more about your motivations.

Why not find out what I can do for you today? Text me now.

 

Name:  Aaron

Position: Personal Trainer

Phone Number:  020 993 9731

Website: www.emstarpersonaltraining.co.uk

 

QUALIFICATIONS

BSc Sports Science Degree

Lever 3 Personal Trainer

Level 2 Gym Instructor

Level 2 First Aid

 

SPECIALIST AREAS

Core and abs Training

Muscle Building

Total Weight/ Fat Loss

 

FUN FACTS

I have met Frank Bruno and trained with his coach at a special sporting event.

I was taught by some of the same lecturers as Audley Harrison at Brunel University.

    

Societies expectations vs authentic self

From the moment we are born, society teaches us the rules we need to survive.  We are conditioned with messages about what is right and what is wrong, what we should and shouldn’t do.  Often, we only feel valid and “okay” if we comply with societies expectations.  However this often brings us into conflict with our own authentic selves.  For example, if you feel really upset over an incident, but your society has given you a strong message that crying is weakness, you feel compelled to stay strong to comply with societies expectations, whilst at the same time, feeling low and sad inside.  Often these internal conflicts can be the source of depression and anxiety reactions.  So in this post, we are going to look at some common issues which we all experience in life and consider if they can actually be healthy.

 

1. Anger

Anger is something many of us avoid expressing and yet it can often be very liberating. Feeling angry but expressing it in a healthy way can create powerful and positive change in our lives. Anger is simply a type of emotional energy that rises up in us when we have been wronged and a personal boundary has been crossed. That energy is set out on a mission to dismantle the inappropriate situation that has caused our suffering.

So, learn how to embrace that energy and put it to positive use. When you become angry, examine how you can express that anger in a positive way that will create change for the better. It is when we deny our anger and avoid it that it can turn into more unhealthy ways of being, such as rage or depression. Know that healthy anger is there for a reason, to be your protector and liberator.

 

2. Being Lost

We are feeling lost when we have lost our sense of direction. Yet when we are lost, it makes us pay attention to the moment and to our instincts. If you have ever been lost in a big city or a foreign land, you likely also made some wonderful discoveries while trying to find your way.

The same is true for life. Be okay with knowing it is the journey that is important, and sometimes in being lost and going down paths we never would have thought to choose we find out things about ourselves that are amazing. We discover unknown talents in ourselves, and meet friends or allies who otherwise would have remained a mystery. Being lost now doesn’t mean you will be lost forever. It simply means you are taking your time in finding your way, and also allowing the world around you to give input into the path which is best for you. Often it is that input we never would have dreamed to ask for that sets us on our true path.

 

3. Crying

Crying, like anger, is a healthy human emotional response to certain situations. Although few of us would want to be crying all the time, it is important to honor those times in life which may bring us to tears. Those tears can be tears of loss but also of joy. When we cry, it helps our psyche unleash energy that if we were to hold on to may become toxic or make us rigid.

Crying also softens our personalities as well as our appearance to the outside world, letting others know we feel, care, grieve and are effected by the world around us. So, crying not only lets us release our grief and sorrow, but also sends a signal to others that we are open and vulnerable as human beings, making us more attractive as friends and partners than those who never shed a tear for any reason.

 

4. Being alone

Being alone doesn’t have to be seen in a negative way and often can mean that we are just cutting off some of the not necessary social activities to dive into a deeper level of our being. It’s true that there are some situations where a person isolating themselves might be a reason of concern, but know as well that many of the world’s greatest artists, writers and thinkers found supreme value in solitude to find deeper inspiration and re-ignited their sense of creativity. Sometimes we just need to turn off the external stimuli and be with ourselves.

If you are feeling the need to be alone, trust and honor it. Sometimes a walk by yourself in the park, or even going on a solo vacation can lead to a level of self-reflection that completely renews our sense of purpose. In some situations, the healthiest thing you can do for yourself is to be alone.

 

5. Not listening

Not listening to others may often be seen as an anti-social or even arrogant form of behavior, and yet there are times when you need to just go on your own intuition and be free with what your inner calling is. Keeping your eye on a strong vision sometimes requires you to ignore or tune out those voices who may not understand or be in alignment with that vision. Trust yourself and know that if advice is being given to you there may be some very good reasons not to listen to it.

Not listening can also simply display a level of discernment, as we have all seen those people who listen to what everyone else tells them, and how they can often appear to be captains on a rudderless ship, lacking an internal strong sense of direction. Be wise and know when to listen to others and when not to. If that inner bell says to go on your own gut feeling in spite of what others say, then trust it.

 

6. Breaking the rules

Breaking the rules at times can improve your life, as well as the lives of others. Rules are made by people, and none of us are perfect. So, trust in your own ability to find the heart behind the rule, and then decide for yourself if that rule promotes the greater good. Most innovations in art, science and society happen because someone stopped abiding by the rules as they were written and had the courage to challenge those rules that were unjust. Some of the world’s great rule breakers were Rosa Parks, Gandhi, John Lennon, and Martin Luther King Jr. Don’t be afraid to be like them.

 

7. Not fitting in

Not fitting in can be painful and awkward, especially during teenage years, but it can also mean you’re an innovator and that you have something to offer beyond the norm. When we fit in, it is usually because our thoughts, feelings and even our imagination is in tune with our community. Stepping outside that box of what others might expect of us can lead us into a place of not fitting in, but it can also lead us to explore outside the zone of commonly accepted beliefs and thoughts, which is the fertile ground for new ideas and new ways of thinking that beget innovation.

The future never fits nicely into the past, so embrace who you are in the now even if it doesn’t fit in with others. Know that your innovations may forge a new path that others may eventually follow.

 

Credits: lifehack.org, by Brett Bevell

Fear of change

While there are some people out there who relish change and embrace new experiences, for many of us change instils a feeling of fear which can manifest in angry, destructive or self-limiting behaviours. 

Humans like security and certainty and we are generally creatures of habit. The idea of breaking our habits often leads to anxiety, which is why many of us don’t change until the discomfort of our situation becomes greater than our fear of change e.g. someone may only make a real and concerted effort to lose weight after a heart attack or similar .

Many of you reading this will have faced the situation of wanting a new job.  You may be unhappy in your current role, feeling undervalued and underpaid, and yet at the same time, something prevents you from looking for a new job.  This is often fear of the unknown.  In your current role, you may not be happy, but you know what you are unhappy about and you have become used to and prepared for that unhappiness.  Thinking about trying something new often brings with it that uncertainty which you can’t prepare for.  A well-known saying is: 

“The certainty of misery is preferable to the misery of uncertainty”. 

These feelings are very primal and instinctive.  For primitive man thousands of years ago, doing anything new or unknown could bring dangerous consequences, e.g. leaving the protection of the forest to hunt animals could leave you vulnerable to an animal attack yourself or eating an unknown berry could result in poisoning. 

This instinct is also reinforced through learnt behaviour.  As children, we are taught about the world around us and often allowed to feel safe in familiar surroundings but made to feel cautious and wary in unknown and unfamiliar situations, e.g. don’t talk to strangers, don’t leave my side, don’t go there, don’t do this, etc. 

So what can we do about it?  Consciously recognising the feelings is a fantastic start.  All too often, people feel an unpleasant feeling and react automatically to distance themselves from that feeling as quickly as possible.  Often this automatic reaction is unhealthy, limiting and reinforces the original belief that there is something to be worried about.  So instead, simply allow yourself to sit with the feeling.  Resist the temptation to get rid of it and just be interested in the discomfort and view it with curiosity.  Allow yourself to become aware of the feeling and understand the message it is trying to communicate.  This increased level of understanding and awareness will not make the feeling disappear, but will allow you to tolerate and control it, allowing you to make those changes you desire in your life.

Curiosity is not about what is right or wrong, it is about a greater understanding of yourself.  The more you allow yourself to be curious about your feelings and the thoughts and beliefs which accompany them, the greater control you will have over them.  

Hypnotic Gastric Band interview

I was recently asked to take part in a short interview about my work with weight loss hypnosis, particularly the hypnotic gastric band.  This interview is available on ChiswickBuzz, a local, online television channel for Chiswick. 

You can see the interview by clicking on this link: Weight Loss Hypnosis Chiswick